Wakefield, NH

Gary Stephen Chag, a long-time commercial airline pilot and U.S. Air Force veteran who was so unfailingly positive and polite that he once tried to hold the door open for someone while lying on a hospital gurney, died at his wife's home in Charlestown, Massachusetts, on Thursday, July 23, 2020 from metastatic prostate cancer. He was 68.

Gary was a natural leader in his professional and personal life, calm and mild-mannered under even the most difficult circumstances. He commanded a C-141 troop and cargo carrier during Operation Desert Storm and, after landing an American Airlines plane with an engine on fire, used the unexpected layover to visit his ailing mother-in-law in a nursing home. Before deciding to forgo treatment in favor of hospice care, Gary held a meeting with his family to hear their concerns. The peace with which he made his decision was almost palpable. When his youngest daughter told him she was praying for a miracle, Gary said he'd rather it go to someone else.

"I've lived a good life," he said many times.

And he did.

Gary was born on March 22, 1952, in Weare, New Hampshire. His father, Starvro Chag (originally Chagrasulis), sold insurance, among other pursuits, and his mother, Joan Sawyer Chag, worked as a nurse before they married.

Gary attended Weare High School. In the "superlatives" section of his senior yearbook, he was voted friendliest, most popular, best looking, most talented, best dressed, and most likely to succeed. Gary was valedictorian of his class (he always pointed out that it was a very small class), and he and his two younger brothers, Mark and David, made up a good portion of the school's student council and athletic teams each season.

After graduating in 1970, Gary wanted to challenge himself and sought an appointment to the U.S. Air Force Academy. He received two—from both of New Hampshire's senators at the time. While at the academy, Gary majored in chemistry and was a distinguished graduate of the Class of 1974 (Mark and David grew their hair long for the ceremony, just because Gary couldn't). In addition to his role as a C-141 commander, Gary served as an instructor and check pilot for the T-37 "Tweety Bird" teaching fighter pilots how to fly.

In more than two decades of service in the U.S. Air Force and Air Force Reserves , Gary flew high-priority missions for the president and other notable officials and was awarded two Commendation Medals and one Meritorious Service Medal. He retired as a lieutenant colonel in 1994 . Gary met his first wife, Patricia Sologuren Chag, while he was stationed in Columbus, Mississippi. The couple later married, had two daughters, and relocated to New Jersey and eventually New Hampshire.

In 1982, Gary became a pilot for U.S. Airways (which merged with American Airlines), serving as captain and check airman. Along the way, he earned a master's degree in aeronautical science from Embry-Riddle Aeronautical University. In 2017, when he turned 65—the Federal Aviation Administration's mandatory retirement age—Gary captained his last flight after more than four decades and nearly 30,000 hours in the air . Several of his family members were on board.

In retirement, Gary worked as a handyman. As a joke, his oldest daughter gave him business cards identifying him as the principal of "Odd Ball Jobs," and he handed the cards out, later registering the business as an LLC. Gary was so honest he once took a loss on a job that turned out to cost more than he had quoted the client, and, because he was paid by the hour, he removed the "Retired—What's the Hurry?" bumper sticker from his truck. Gary also served as a substitute teacher, taught aviation at a community college, and—just to stay busy—loaded bags at the airport on Martha's Vineyard, where his second wife, Sherry Grancey has a home.

In his spare time over the years, Gary volunteered as a mediator for the New Hampshire Consumer Protection Bureau, took calls for a suicide prevention hotline, and read the newspaper over the radio for people with visual impairments. Gary also played and refereed soccer and was an avid runner. He ran on layovers, on visits to his daughters in cities across the country, and around his home on Pine River Pond in Wakefield, New Hampshire. He also loved to read and made a point of getting his news from liberal and conservative outlets so he could stay informed and balanced.

Throughout his life, nothing made Gary happier than being with his family. Every summer, he and Sherry hosted a reunion on Pine River Pond, inviting everyone, including friends of friends of friends (Gary kept a list of people's preferred food and drink, which he updated each year). He and his brothers were inseparable, and—in Gary's words—his pride for his daughters Tiffany and Melody "knew no bounds." Any time he had them both next to him on a couch at the same time, he cried happy tears. Mostly, Gary laughed, even after it hurt to do so.

Gary had hoped to live longer than his parents, who both died at 70. He didn't quite make it, but he never stopped trying. After his cancer spread, Gary endured two spine surgeries, radiation, and chemotherapy, among other treatments. But he was never outwardly angry or bitter. When he lost feeling in his legs and was taken to the emergency room, he smiled for his hospital admission photo. After one surgery—in a gown and on a gurney—he reached back to hold the door open for someone else.

"Little by little," he said of his progress whenever anyone asked.

During his recovery, if Gary couldn't walk around the building or apartment one day, he always planned to do so the next. Not long ago, nearly two years since he last played in a game, he said he'd like to start the first hospice patient soccer team.

"We might have to be carried off the field," he said, "but that happens all the time."

In addition to his parents, Gary was preceded in death by a half-brother. He is survived by his wife Sherry; a daughter, Tiffany Chag, and her wife, Rebecca Beyer; a daughter, Melody Pourchot, and her husband, Ricky Pourchot; his grandson, Vail Pourchot; his first wife, Patricia Chag; his brothers Mark and David Chag and their wives Deb and Lucie Chag; and many nieces and nephews and extended family members. Services at the New Hampshire State Veterans Cemetery will be private. In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations to the Sierra Club (Gary was a long-time donor) or the Pan-Mass Challenge, which raises funds for the Dana-Farber Cancer Institute where Gary was a patient ( Tiffany Chag and Rebecca Beyer are participants).